I seem to be stuck on one internal setting, and it is “fast forward.” When I am not attempting to GSD, I am thinking about how I can get stuff done.
I’ve always been proactive, but since having Ben and needing to juggle more, I’m in overdrive. This works well to ensure that our family can function. This does not bode so well for chilling. It’s a recurring theme in my life; I’ve written entire articles on it. I do fine if if I’m sitting in a good movie or show, but at home, it’s hard for me to take mental breaks from that endless to-do-list in my head. Lately, though, Ben’s been helping out with my zen.
This is somewhat ironic, given that he is one of the main reasons I can’t sit down much. He has places to go and things to ruin, and he runs—not walks—anywhere. One of his favorite games involves jumping off the living room ottoman onto the sofa; whether the ottoman is actually close to the sofa does not seem to matter. He also enjoys tossing whatever he can get his hands on off the front porch or back deck. Granted, this is better than his toss-everything-in-the-toilet phase, although I found my blush brush lying in the bushes the other day.
But then, Ben brings my mind into focus. He’s in a “why?” phase—he wants to know: Why are there bees in the bushes? Why do Sabrina and Max go to school? Why do I go to work? Why do socks exist? Why does he need to eat dinner? Why is it getting dark? Why do cows moo? Having these chats with him yanks my brain back to the present, so I can’t be preoccupied with all the things I need to get done.
And then, bath time. He loves it so much that lately, he refuses to leave the bathroom until the last bit of water has drained. At first I was all, “Ben, time to put on pajamas!” But now I take the extra couple of minutes to perch and watch the water trickle out of the tub.
“All gone!” he announces when the last glurg is heard. And for those precious minutes, that drive to do, do, do is all gone, too.
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